In Shocking Turn of Events, Federal Government Announces Bold New Plan to Combat Global Warming: Shooting Water into Space

In a stunning announcement today, the federal government revealed a bold new plan to combat global warming: shooting water into space.

According to government officials, the plan, dubbed “Project AquaBlast,” will involve the use of specialized rockets to launch water into the upper atmosphere, where it will be vaporized by the sun’s heat. The resulting steam will then be released into space, where it will act as a shield against incoming solar radiation.

However, environmentalists have warned that the plan may have unintended consequences. According to their calculations, the excess water vapor in the atmosphere could lead to an increase in cloud cover, potentially causing a new ice age on Earth. Some have even speculated that the icicles formed from the frozen water vapor could fall back down to the Earth, causing widespread destruction.

“This is a reckless and irresponsible plan that is more likely to create new problems than solve the ones we already have,” said Greenpeace spokesperson Dr. Jane Doe. “We need to focus on real solutions to climate change, not crazy schemes that could potentially lead to our own demise.”

Despite the criticism, the government remains committed to Project AquaBlast, with plans to begin launching water into space as soon as next year. “We believe this is the best hope for saving the planet, and we’re willing to take the risk,” said government spokesperson Dr. John Smith at a press conference today. “We’ll just have to hope that our plan doesn’t backfire and lead to our own destruction.”