Bigfoot Sighting: Sasquatch Army Rises From Water, Attacks Maryland

Talbot County MD:  Hundreds of witnesses have reported an army of subterranean creatures rising from the Chesapeake Bay.  Green glowing eyes and seaweed covered black fur Sasquatch numbering in the hundreds have been spotted across the region destroying everything in their paths.  Residents are unsure what has caused the attacks.  The creatures have come to Easton and surrounding towns with no apparent purpose other than leveling the area.

Six or Eight of the beasts will work together to push down the walls of mansions and crab serving restaurants alike.  They smash through bricks with their bare fists and can stomp through asphalt with nothing but their size 40 (approx) feet.  No one is sure what has caused the invasion, but many suspect it has something to do with the economy.

James Whitcombe, crabber, and a long time resident of the eastern shore says, “Times are tough.  We’re not catching any crabs.  The restaurants just aren’t buying. Maybe they Sasquatch are being driven from the sea.”

Ellen Deganes has another theory. She states, “One wealthy older couple was watching CNBC day and night.  They started freaking themselves out with all that bad stocks news.  Even though they have millions, they figured they were probably broke. They have a huge horse farm with 12 Arabian horses that they no longer wanted to buy corn to feed.  The old man lured the horses into an old tractor trailer and dumped the trailer down by one of the creeks leaving the horses to die.  Nobody lives down that way, so nobody heard them kicking.   By morning the trailer was found empty with hoof impressions all along the outside.  The metal doors had been torn off their hinges from the top down and we found some big prints down there.  I doubt the horses did that”

The horses were found in a local pasture unharmed.  The same cannot be said for the older couple.  When we went to their house to report on the horses we found nothing but a dried up scalp and a pile of teeth and broken bones.

No one knows for sure what these creatures are, or why they’ve come, but we do know one thing.  If you see one, hide.  If you see the green of their eyes, you are probably already dead.