How To Make Money Fighting Famous Bears
Step 1: Find a Famous Bear
In order to make money fighting with bears, the wild ones must be avoided. Not only are they dangerous, but there is no money to be made fighting these nameless bears. The public is interested in seeing matches with famous bears, so try to arrange one with one of the giants such as Winnie the Pooh, Yogi Bear, Papa Bear of the Bernstein bears, or even the Coca-Cola endorsed Polar Bear.
Step 2: Study Your Opponent’s Fighting Technique
Use any means possible to arrange a bout with the bear that you want to challenge. If the bear doesn’t feel like fighting you, simply do something to make him angry. Bears have tremendous tempers; even Winnie can become enraged if you take his beloved “hunny.” Once you’ve arranged the bout, do some research, and study your opponent’s fighting technique. View tapes of any previous fights or observe him in his natural habitat if possible
Step 3: Get In the Ring
Once you feel that you have the advantage over your opponent, get into the ring and fight that bear! If you have followed the suggested steps and chosen a famous bear, the fight will be easy. Years of fame have most likely taken the fighting spirit out of your enemy, and he will be easily toppled.
Step 4: Defeat Your Opponent
Fighting famous bears can be difficult and sometimes dangerous. Be confident that you can defeat your opponent. Use the knowlege you gain through observing the famous bear to conquer him. Avoid his special attacks, such as the dreaded bear hug and the powerful bear claw. Repeated blows to the nose and face will usually bring down even the toughest famous bear. Remember his face is his most valuable asset; destroy it and victory is yours.
Step 5: Collect Your Prize Money
Depending on how you have arranged the bout, you may collect a purse whether you defeat the bear or not. Assuming you win the match, however, you should collect a rather large prize. This means that you are now ready to go on to battle more famous bears for more money. Good luck and good fighting!
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How To Make $ Fighting Famous Bears
I’m gonna print a brochure!!!
Cool!
I just made a fortune kicking winnie’s butt, thank you for the great tips!
fighting non-famous bears is a bad idea mostly because they want to eat what they fight, famous bears are very selective they prefer lipton brisk ice tea and angry whoppers
i kicked the living crap out of “BooBoo”, and i didn’t make a cent. i was just practicing. I take on “Gentle Ben” next week. He’s real old and hasn’t any teeth. should be the easiest money I’ve ever made.
Welcome to the circuit. Remember don’t waste your energy on street fighting.
THAT WAS LAMEST THING I HEARD IN AWHILE
Bears think they’re so bad. They make a lot of noise and try to scare you. Just avoid their claws and you can easily take them out with a well placed kick to the nads.
The real money is in mud wrestling with sharks.
I totally thrashed Jabberjaws and earned a tidy sum. Next I’m scheduled to take on the guy from “Jaws”, which should be a walk in the park as I heard he’s now having mechanical problems as he’s over 36 years old.
I hate sharks.