Dissatisfied with the poor performance of Katie Couric, Sean McManus, president of CBS News and Don Hewitt, CBS news executive producer have announced she is being replaced by 5 year old Randall Stottingham. Randall, known to many as the tiny anchorman, is the five year old “child” of CBS Evening News.
First introduced to the world in in 2004, the tiny anchorman is the result of a story CBS news did on test tube babies at the time. When the subject of their story, Le’Baby Group closed their doors shortly after the story ran, Michigan state courts were left to decide the fate of several babies left wandering around the facilities. CBS news stepped up and took tiny Randall under their wing. “He was raised right here in our corporate office, a true company man. He knows the news like no one else. In fact, the only thing we’ve ever allowed him to watch is the news. He was born for this job, and it’s keeping him out of the orphanage” stated McManus.
The boy had this to say, “Katie is like a mother to me, but it’s time for her to move on. Plus she can get another job, I have no other options. It’s either this or become a ward of the state.”
The tiny anchorman is set to take over for Couric starting May 1.
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