Interview with a Teenage Werewolf

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werewolf (correction by Kate!)

It’s not every day that you get the chance to interview a werewolf.  One of the benefits of a site like EMToast is that you have an opportunity to meet mythical creatures right in the comments section.  Please enjoy my interview with Alex aka Decronis and learn what it’s like to be a werewolf in 2010.

Decronis: wanna see real were (wolf) just, piss me off and you well see one

EMToast: I well? Fuck you!!! Now change.

Decronis: sometimes we run on two legs some times four sometimes five if u catch my drift

Decronis: all of u are fake. im the eighteen son of the devil my name is decronis my birth name is alex veleteriz im a werewolf and i hate it its not a blessing it a punishment killing the ones u love for food pains me. i wish i could die but i cant. i used to live in aurora its a different dimension. earth is just a feeding ground for us. my dad a.k.a devil as u guys call him took over a mans life and got a girl pregnant when i was born i was taken away from my mother to live in aurora were i was trained to become the perfect killer a werewolf. when i was four i was returned home to my mother but she did not no me so i was taken to a orphanage soon kids were missing cuz i needed to eat an thats all im gonna tell u guys for now

Decronis: if at least one of u guys are a real werewolf come find me and try to kill me cuz i have a horrible life as a werewolf i live in Barrel Alaska it shouldn’t be hard to find me just use your nose i smell like bazel and death and if ur looking for a fight u got one

EMToast: maybe you should go back to aurora where you belong.

Decronis: im not aloud, every one in aurora wants to make me a slave because i helped a angel escape custody of my dad , and I had no choice to help her cuz she was my girlfriend and i loved her

EMToast: I like the way you think kid. If you want to chronicle your life story for EMToast, let me know. I bet you have some stories to tell.

Decronis: trust me i have more stories then a library

EMToast: Did you ever have to fight for your life against a wizard or a vampire from aurora?

Decronis: yea but i never fought a wizard because there are friends to us and im more than a werewolf im banchy, dragon, and vampire. i was born a dragon first was never a werewolf yet. when i was in aurora age two i was thrown into a cave filed with werewolves, the one that bit u was the one you were going to become that was the rules. unfortunately i was bitten by an alpha werewolf.an alpha or an omega was the strongest creatures in aurora. my dad paid the alpha to bite me. when i was two my dad cut my stomach open and put three banchys in me so i can turn into one. when i was three i was also thrown into another cave filed with vampires i was bitten by an omega witch was the leader. a month later i was trained in the art of pent (pentagrams) attacks witch was a one hit kill move

EMToast: Wow you must be strong. But since you were turned vampire at age 3, do you still have a 3 year old dragons body. Vampires don’t age right? Or is there some way you can become an adult still?

Decronis: vampire age so i have an adults body. well i kinda have an adults body cuz im 15

the only thing i can turn into on earth is a vampire and werewolf because in aurora there is a toxin in the air that lets the mystical creatures breath so if i turned into a dragon or a banchy on earth i would instantly go into a coma. and the only reason i choose not to turn into a vampire is because 1.there as big as a small plain 2. always mad 3. kills 5 times more than a werewolf and 4.they do not give a crap who sees them like if the government see me i would be in bigger trouble in aurora and they mite send bounty hunters to come get me.

EMToast: Is Aurorora hell? Just wondering because you have 17 brothers and your father is the devil. Or did he just take over an aurora man to impregnate your mother?

Decronis: sorry i forget to tell you there is a lot more dimensions then just one. hell is its own dimension, aurora is a place for all good and bad

EMToast: How much do you weigh as a dragon? Like 500 lbs?

Is your vampire form bigger or smaller than the dragon. Tell me more about the banshees. This is some good stuff.

Decronis: we dragons don’t weigh that much 80 pounds at best because we need to fly. are bones are hollow and we are 7 feet when we stand, 4 feet when we are on all fours. vampires are a lot bigger then dragon.s vampires wingspan is 22 feet and a dragons is wingspan 13 feet. a banshee is a phantom like creature the only thing we can do is go through walls, thats about it nothing special .

this is cool never told any body my life story. its good to get stuff off my chest

EMToast: It’s interesting. Strange, but that’s what we’re all about. How about your human form? Does it look normal or do you have dragon or werewolf features?

Decronis: my human form looks normal

EMToast: What other dimensions have you gone too besides aurora and this one?

Decronis: I’ve never really been to any other dimension besides hell and aurora I’ve only herd about the other dimensions

EMToast: Thanks Decronis. Is there anything else you want to add before we wrap up the interview? Would you like to apologize to any of the people you had to eat like those orphan kids?

Might as well take this opportunity to unload some guilt. Everyone understands it’s not easy to be cursed.

Decronis: yes i would like to say im sorry for eating the orphans and im sorry they never got a chance to grow up, also i would like to say im sorry for killing all of the secret service officers for trying to contain me in area S-4
Reply

EMToast: Thank you Decronis. Please drop by again and tell us more of your stories.

To see the original interview in it’s unedited form, please visit the comments section of  Werewolf Sighting: Boy Poisons Creature with Antifreeze

Creative Commons License photo credit: eschipul

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7 thoughts on “Interview with a Teenage Werewolf

  1. fuck man that is some heinous shit when your dad cuts you open and fills you with banshees, I guess they don’t have child protective services in other dimensions

  2. oh, that’s right. they don’t at all actually.
    right.
    my bad….
    guess its better that you have the vampire pic then as, by comparison, werewolf pictures must be quite common.

  3. That’s obviously fake. Im a real were. Not a stupid poser like whoever that is. And a werewolf tip of the day is: 95% of all weres HATE Twilight!!

  4. OMG! DECRONIS FEVER! Your trending with beastiality and pedophilia! Keven Spacey is like your Van Helsing – TOTES!
    you piece of shit!

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