Comments on: 9 Year Old Boy Commits Suicide After Learning Mummies Are Real

By: The purple Fist

The purple Fist — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 20:37:07 +0000

Childhood’s a trip.
I got so mad I killed the easter bunny when I found out santa wasn’t real.
I’m still doing community service because of that one.

By: Flipper

Flipper — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 07:34:07 +0000

Mummies are real, and they are scary. They are also old, lascivious perverts. Stay away from them, they like to do strange things to young boys with their 3,000 year old dried salamis.

By: robert crumb

robert crumb — Sun, 18 Jul 2010 21:10:35 +0000

so mummies are real. big deal.
howdy doody’sreal too.
now THAT’S scary!

By: Toastmaster

Toastmaster — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 09:51:34 +0000

Tell that to Brendan Fraser.

By: sickjunior

sickjunior — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 05:02:30 +0000

so mummies are real. so what? they don’t do anything but lie there and smell musty.

By: Toastmaster

Toastmaster — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 03:53:55 +0000

I was saddened to find out that 9 year olds actually do commit suicide sometimes.

By: Cyrano

Cyrano — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 18:38:30 +0000

Ha! I went to that elementary school! But it’s called HillTOP not HillSTOP.

By: bixby

bixby — Mon, 25 May 2009 21:42:40 +0000

total creep, he probably has people locked in his basement and he makes them fight like giraffes.

By: Toastmaster

Toastmaster — Mon, 25 May 2009 21:06:57 +0000

This Randy Stott sounds like a real creep. Especially about the imac thing.

By: bixby

bixby — Mon, 25 May 2009 20:45:34 +0000

who the hell is randy stott?

By: reddit-mann

reddit-mann — Mon, 25 May 2009 20:30:44 +0000

Of course it’s fake, everything that gets posted on this site is fake.

What isn’t fake is that Randy Stott (the blog’s owner) seems to have a fetish for badly-photoshopped shitstains on women. Why? Who can say. Maybe in his twisted version of reality that counts as hilarious, but I’m guessing he was really masturbating behind his iMac whilst drawing dark, brown blobs on Jennifer Lopez’ ass.

By: KEYSTONE

KEYSTONE — Mon, 25 May 2009 19:59:16 +0000

is there a giant retarded halloween cat staring at them from the window?

By: bixby

bixby — Sun, 24 May 2009 17:41:48 +0000

I believe it! Lodi is a pretty scary place, then you add mummies to the equation and forget it. Game over!

By: Anna Hopkins

Anna Hopkins — Sun, 24 May 2009 08:47:27 +0000

This is fake. I don’t believe it. It’s way too macabre for a nine-year-old.

By: Toastmaster

Toastmaster — Sun, 24 May 2009 07:00:43 +0000

The reddit user PT2 has said:

“no fricken’ way …

I wonder if that’s a statistic?

I might start putting up posters in my neighbourhood that say, “Mummies are real!” and see if the suicide rate goes up.”